I’m In Trouble

I’m In Trouble
Do you know the three words you hate to hear when you are having sex? They are: “Honey I’m home.”
That just happened to me and I am in deep trouble. My wife came home and caught me in bed with a little midget woman. She started screaming and crying and pitching a fit and said “You promised me you wouldn’t run around on me anymore.” To which I replied “Well, you can see I’ve cut down.”
By the way, I finally figured out why my eyes burn so much during sex: It’s the mace.

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